The world of George RR Martin’s Westeros is largely accepted to be based in a harsh, cruel, mediveal world. When somebody gets stabbed in the back in game of thrones then the knife is quite clearly put between the shoulder blades.
As the years roll by with civilization improving along with technology the game of thrones world would start to look like ours. Will winter still be coming and will dragons still be around? Let’s see.
The world of Westeros will probably just be as surreal and barmy as this one. Although lets assume that democracy has arrived and that the ruler is now voted to the Iron throne rather than inherited or in some cases taken by force.
Nevertheless the old order of the Targaryen, Lannister’s, Baratheon and Starks will no doubt still be pulling the strings. Indeed you can imagine the Lannister’s being a respectable investment group with an old history that only the very influential and old houses do business with.
The Black watch no longer patrols the wall as that has now been outsourced to an attactive bidder. It’s all about costs of course and getting the best for the taxpayer. Although strangely as in this world the taxpayer is lumbered with a higher bill and a poorer service.
Instead the Black Watch are now a political party who are seen as being the watcher for the people. After all Jon Snow went out of his way to protect the wildlings and ordinary folk so would be against the Lannister and Targaryen party the Congaryen party.
The politics though wouldn’t be clear cut with the Black Watch party hierachy assuming a procession when electing their Lord Commander. However just as Jeremy Corbyn pissed off his own MPs by standing as leader there will be a squawking of feathers as the Black Watch members unexpectedly elect a Jon Snowbyn. But just like those traitorous ‘crows,’ and the Labour rebels found to their cost after stabbing Snowbyn in the back he rises just like Jon Snow did from the dead to continue to lead the Black Watch. A leader who very much believes in the people.
As there is a ‘Jon we can,’ figure then inevitably there has to be a high sparow who claims to speak for the common people but just exploits the fears for his own interests. Like the high sparrow he wants to be seen as a normal chap so what better way than wearing a camel coat, drinking a pint, smoking a fag, whilst bemoaning that ‘all these bloody wildlings are coming over here, taking jobs from Westeros people and need to be sent packing.’ Loved and loathed this Farage Roche type like the high sparrow just loves the attention. Furthermore he also needs watching.
The leader on the Iron Throne will sadly not be a Tyrion Lannister type who has the brains and charms to manage Government but will be a poor mans Jamie Lannister. Although he might be from a rich and privileged family this leader is a bit of a chancer without the good looks.
As the likes of Farage Roche leader of the high sparrow party want Westeros out of WEU (Westeros and Essos Union) Cameron Lannister decides to nip it in the bud by calling a referundum.
Now old Cameron Lannister hasn’t learnt from almost being scorched from when he almost lost the North. After recovering from the white walker Thatcher type who did her best to break the north they decide that they want out and declare another Stark as the King of the North. The North lest it be said remembers. However he doesn’t learn from history and after booking the Freys for a family wedding and to celebrate independence it all gets a bit stabby with Cameron Lannister regaining the north.
Despite almost losing the north Cameron Lannister is fed up with his party wanting out of the WEU and moaning that it was much better in the days of dragons, plundering, and murdering than it is now.
Believing that people will trust him despite just wiping his bloody hands from the Frey’s wedding celebrations he persists to go ahead with the referundum. Besides would anyone really want to lose the benefits being in the WEU brings? Cameron Lannister believes it so much that he doesn’t even bother with a plan in case the leave vote does actually win.
Cameron Lannister’s younger brother Bozza with his mad hair and eccentric behaviour (think a ugly version of Tyrion with less charm) decides its time to make his move to sit on the Iron Throne. He thinks the vote will be close but the people won’t be daft enough to leave the WEU . If it’s close enough then this might wound Cameron Lannister for him to make a play to be the new leader of Westeros.
Consequently with his pal (a very poor man’s Bronn) a Michael Gove type Called Brove he attempts to usurp his brother Cameron by backing the leave campaign. That way he’ll have the backing of the leave support if the vote is a close remain. What he doesn’t count on is that Westeros want out as the people are fed up with politicians not listening to them. Besides which some of them are listening too much to the high sparrow Farage Roche who think the vote is more on getting rid of the wildlings rather than the economic impact it will have on every day lives.
Dodgy Cameron Lannister is left open mouthed and as he has no idea on what to do next decides to leave sharpish on a dragon. This means another leader for the Iron Throne is needed with Bozza deciding that he might as well get his dream job.
This is where it now starts to get bloody as Brove wakes up one morning and whilst looking in the mirror decides that he wants to be boss. So as Bozza goes up the stairs to place his large arse on the throne Brove stabs him in the back. In response Brove gets attacked whilst tiptoeing through the bodies is Cersei May who gets to sit on the Iron Throne. Like Cersei her ambitions doesn’t match her talents as the dawning realisation of the mess that Cameron Lannister means that there is no plan and winging it isn’t going to cut it.
Over in Essos and the free cities of Braavos etc who are now a major global world power Joffrey Trump vows to make the free cities great again. Not only will he build a wall to keep the Dothraki out and make them pay but your not going to believe the amount of dragons he is going to get. As for the Daenery’s free health care for the free cities well that’s getting ripped up straight away.
Despite being a misogynist, racist, bully he manages to beat the equally unpopular red witch Melisandre Clinton. With cries of ‘Joffrey is going to make the free cities great again,’ and ‘he’s the only one who listens to the common people,’ Joffrey is at a loss on how he is going to deliver. Especially all those dragons he’s promised.
The Iron Islands are now no longer seen as the fierce sea raiders that caused mayhem around Westeros. It’s a world that the Greyjoy’s and the Iron born would be quite frankly appalled with. Despite it’s rugged outlook the Iron Islands are now a beacon of liberal metropolitan tolerance. Rather than fighting the modern day Iron born would rather have a latte outside some sophisticated coffee shop. They also enjoy a high standard of living who are now tolerant of other people and happy to provide a helping hand to those in need. Violence in the Iron Islands is certainly not the answer and would rather discuss these anger and emotions in a circle to help you.
Kings landing would now be a thriving lively metropolitan city with everything moving at one hundred miles an hour. So fast that they would make Daenery’s dragons dizzy. The underground and especially the gold line would be hard to navigate for strangers. So much so that you would be wandering about like Ayra Stark and Brienne of Tarth.
Other parts of Westeros would view Kings Landing as being pretentious and for those that only have money. There would certainly be some truth in that as Flea bottom and Blackwater rush would no longer be a place where the poor people mingle. Instead the character would be stripped out of it as trendy apartments and banking institutions would be based around Blackwater. As for flea bottom well if you fancy visiting an ostentatious cereal cafe and pay twenty quid for a bowl of Dothraki wheat nuggets then flea bottom is the place for you.
Hipsters would be the new white walkers (the original white walkers all but extinct due to global warming) walking around with skinny tight multi-coloured jeans and a beard that would put Robert Baratheon to shame. You would hear overhear them saying things like ‘The old God that I worship is so obscure that you probably won’t have heard of him or her.’ There would also be a few hipster faceless men who would go around declaring that ‘this face is so obscure that you probably don’t recognise it.’
Much as capitalism rules the world today the financial clout of the Iron bank runs the world of Westeros. They would be the ones still pulling the chains and with the insane greed similar to the pyschotic Ramsey Snow it’s not long before the banks go under.
Prior to this you would have Ramsey Snow types declaring that ‘greed is good,’ whilst sipping Dorne champagne. By night and let’s be honest probably by day these Ramsey Snow types behave like Brett Ellis American pyscho where everything including people are a commodity.
Inevitably the banks would come crashing down like they did in 2008 and the shit starts hitting the fan. A brotherhood without banners occupy movement is formed who declare that they represent the ninety nine percent.
Rather than rounding up the rogues and hanging them they would be a bit more peaceful in terms of occupying banks and empty buildings whilst demostrating and demanding a fairer world. This of course gives establishment such as the Lannisters the jitters with mayhem breaking out on the street. There would be clips of the gold cloaks battering hapless demonstrators going viral with tactics such as kettling being used.
Whilst all this is going there would be a fantasy world TV drama without dragons and magic called the war of the roses. What a weird world that is but with all the political intrigue, sex, and a world without dragons, white walkers etc. it pulls the punters in.
Using crows for messages would be so old school. Craw (twitter) and other social media would now be used. Rather than sending a sketch of being pictured with a dragon you can now take a selfie of one whilst sat next to the Iron throne on something called a smart phone. If Margaery Tyrell had her hands on one of these her popularity would have soared more higher than when Cersei blew up the Sept. that she might have actually have got the better of Cersei and the high sparrow.
So much would be going on in this world that pretty much like this one you wouldn’t be surprised if a Targeryen returned whilst riding on a dragon. Although the unrest wouldn’t erupt into civil war after Ned Stark’s execution it would certainly almost be so unsettled that you couldn’t possibly guess what was going to happen next. Will Joffrey Trump get the dragons he promised? Well we’ll just have to wait and see.
Brian Benjamin
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